How can I tell an acquaintance nicely that sh'e not welcome right now?

How can I tell an acquaintance nicely that sh'e not welcome right now? Topic: How can I tell an acquaintance nicely that sh'e not welcome right now?
April 22, 2019 / By Theresa
Question: An old acquaintance just calls me telling me she's visiting the area and would like to see me. This is fine, but I am a dog trainer and am running a dog boarding/training business that requires 24/7 supervision in my home. The first time she called, she told me if I wanted to go shopping with her and I said I couldn't because I need to watch dogs. Now, she just wrote to me she's coming tomorrow to see me. The dogs I board and train are kept loose in my home. I have a reactive dog at this time, that gets easily stressed and for safety, she can't be around him. People often think I work at home and have time. I don't, it's work, just like people go to the office, but mine is an all day thing where I never leave the dogs alone and when I cook my hubby takes over watching them. How can I tell her nicely, look, you are welcome but only after this dog leaves and I have no other dogs coming? I already told her I was stuck with this dog all week and couldn't go out, now she thinks, ok than I go see her.... Perfecttv, it's not crazy. I need to connect with the dog, teach trust, work on stress and this is not possible in a cage. i board only one/two dog at a time to give 100% attention. People send me their dogs from out of state. Google cageless boarding, it's for reactive/stressed dogs that don't do well at the kennel or pampered pooches who want more attention than being closed in a cage all day. Sorry, Cesar is a moron. He has no education whatsoever. If you said Patricia McConnell it was a different story. Google "beyond cesar millan" and look what read dog behavior professionals think about that uneducated guy! Hmm.. so what I do is harm? Go talk to my clients who have dogs I have rehabilitated from severe aggression, stress and OCD. Hmm... I wonder why people send me clients from different states if all I do is harm? Oh right, you are Cesar Millan fan and he's the expert, that gets bit so often causes he can't read dog body language and works always over threshold! True, dogs don't need 24/7 supervision when they are IN A CAGE. Mine are in a cageless environment and I need to read them, film them, report their progress, write my analysis and case studies. But why should I need to go into all these details? You can continue doing what you did in 44 years, I will continue doing what I do since it's working for me. It's my business and I run it how I want..
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Best Answers: How can I tell an acquaintance nicely that sh'e not welcome right now?

Rosanne Rosanne | 3 days ago
Just simply tell her what day you are available. "I would love to see you for a visit. I'm available on ......... Hope that works for you." You don't have to go into any long, drawn out explanation. You don't owe her that. You need to put your home and business first.
👍 134 | 👎 3
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Rosanne Originally Answered: How do you get rid of a friend (nicely)?
I think the natural drift is a good way to go, you can help it along though. Start telling her that you can't pick her up. Cut back on the rides to maybe twice a week, when she calls you're busy doing homework. See you have to create the drift this avoidance is actually a better way of moving into making your point. Because she will say you don't have any time for me any more or some sort of comment along those lines. Then you can tell her well you know we have different interest, and then go from there .This IMO is better than just coming right out and saying I don't want to be friends anymore. You don't want to burn bridges, as far as drugs go I mean look you either have the willpower not to do them or you don't. Its entirely up to you.

Moyna Moyna
Connect with dogs... 24/7. Might I suggest a few courses from Cesar Millan,..you can watch him free on YouTube, oh but then you couldn't be with the dogs 24/7 and connect. Dogs do NOT need your undivided attention to "connect". You do more harm than good. Dogs now what to do, it's people that constantly screw up. I have been working with dogs (animals) for 44 years and never has any dog not even the ones that were "stressed" needed 24/7 supervision. In fact...24/7 for anyone, man or beast is NOT HEALTHY! Everyone, no matter the mental, physical, etc etc need a little me time for whatever reason, even if to just cry, or scream, or have a good scratch in peace and private. Not even a human baby needs to be monitored 24/7, if so parents would go bonkers as would the child at some point. Do you live in a one room home? Seriously you can't put the dog in another room, for an hour? Check on him/her from time to time in that hour your "acquaintance" visit? I suspect if you gave your "acquaintance" the full details as you have here it's likely she will find better company and not trouble you again. Honesty is the best policy.
👍 50 | 👎 -5

Logan Logan
LMAO... go watch videos of Cesar Millan! that's like saying go do surgery by watching an episode of Grey's Anatomy! That guy is just an actor. Even I, who has started studying dogs recently know how outdated and frowned upon are that illegal Mexican guy's methods. He has zero education. I would just tell the guest that you are busy and working on the best interest of the dog and that you'll be available after the dog leaves.
👍 48 | 👎 -13

Karon Karon
She can visit you in your home but if she wants to go out, calmly explain you cannot leave. As she leaves, "Next time give me more advance warning so I don't book a client's dogs for the week and we can spend time together." Make it sound professional "book a client's dogs".....maybe it will sink into her head.
👍 46 | 👎 -21

Hatty Hatty
You run a boarding business but you don't actually board them? You just let them run free? That's crazy! Let her know that you'd love to see her sometime, but this week is not enough notice as you have these issues with your business that need resolution. Thank her for thinking of you and ask if she can contact you in advance next time.
👍 44 | 👎 -29

Hatty Originally Answered: How do you get rid of a friend (nicely)?
I think the natural drift is a good way to go, you can help it along though. Start telling her that you can't pick her up. Cut back on the rides to maybe twice a week, when she calls you're busy doing homework. See you have to create the drift this avoidance is actually a better way of moving into making your point. Because she will say you don't have any time for me any more or some sort of comment along those lines. Then you can tell her well you know we have different interest, and then go from there .This IMO is better than just coming right out and saying I don't want to be friends anymore. You don't want to burn bridges, as far as drugs go I mean look you either have the willpower not to do them or you don't. Its entirely up to you.
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